carry all your thoughts, across the open fields.

Sunday, February 28, 2010

hi humans,
apology for not updating my blog. i was busy plus lazy to update my blog. the last few days was busy with class and stuff so my bad. okay lets start. first thing first, i have officially start my classes. but again i am so not use to my new class and my new classmate. i feel very weird and strange around them. the teacher was KINDA okay. but seriously, frankly i find the class very boring. i can't deny the fact. TSK. i hoped i can adapt to it soon. but i don't think it gonna be that easy. i made a few friends there. and one of my new friends asked me a weird question just after we introduce ourselves.
she: u have a boyfriend?
me: aar, nope. why?
she: HAHA! don't lie to me la.
me: -.-! i am not lying la. do my face look like i am joking?
she: okay then why u don't have boyfriend?
me: why must i have a boyfriend?
she: because u so pretty and bubble-ly so u ought to have one.
me: haha that's what u think. i really don't have.
she: why?
me: because i haven found a suitable one. maybe? okay lets change topic.
OMG! what a question to ask just after we introduce ourselves. weird people ! anyway, enough about school/class etc.

i was whining to AIDAH yesterday night yet again. i was feeling so depress and sad and frustrated and angry. i was feeling so wrong yesterday night. but anyway, thanks for listening to my whining! (: i think today i am feeling better. and i hoped the feeling will soon go away.*cross finger and chattering.
so, since i was super stress yesterday night and i can't go to sleep, out of curiousity and boredom i created tumblr. i make myself busy by customizing it and stuff. but hell no, i don't know how to use it. i am so dumb! but i managed to get the hang of it a bit. but let me tell u i just spammed my tumblr. its really help me to realize my stress! i feel so good.
so today, i went out with shopping partner. it was a last minutes thing. she text me and date me out (: hehe. we went to city hall, suntec and marina. it was hilarious went we are at marina topshop. but i lazy to tell leii. SKIP!
then my mum called me and asked me to have dinner with them. plus to celebrate my dad birthday. so from marina we went separate ways and off to meet my family(:
nothing much actually.

p/s: why must u come back? i have a hard time removing u from my freaking thick skull u know. i don't want the feeling to come back. haiz. it just won't work this way.

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY CHARMAINE!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY CONNIE!
(:

at 2:27 AM

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

hi humans,
second post for the day. i am feeling so pathetic. and i don't know why. i hate the feeling that i am having now! BUMMER! my mind is not at ease. and guess what i am so dead meat! i almost forgotten about charmaine's chalet birthday party! shit, i know right. thank god satish reminded me like a few days ago. DEAD-MEAT! and now i have to re-planned my schedule. i don't even know if i can even attend her party or not because i got class! OMG how??? somebody help me! i really hoped everything gonna go as planned and i can managed my time properly and go for her chalet even if i can't sleepover! *praying hard and chattering* i suddenly miss all my friends! SYAFIQ i want to bowl again can!! text me!
the weather is being sucha .... i need rain!
anyway, my class starts tomorrow and i am super nervous but at the same time i am feeling excited. NOT! i always hate first day of school or work or watever because it make me feels like i am a secondary 1 kids! hahha.
okay enough talking crap here....
ohh wait NO! i seriously need to play tennis! i need to smack that ball right at your face. i am feeling empty!

(:

at 3:48 PM

hi humans,
i am a happy kids! i just came back like half an hour ago and here i am using the lappy. movie with girlfriend at AMKhub. we catch the wolfman. it was kinda nice but i swear the sound effect was damn powerful. i was lucky that i didn't suffered from any heart problem or something, or else i gonna die instantly there. hahha! after the showed we quickly rushed back because we need to trained back to woodlands and i need to catch the bus. unlike her she just have to walk home. hmpft.
this morning i woke up at 9 am. i was supposed to wake up at 8 plus to get ready for my gym. but ended up i overslept. BUMMER!
knowing that i woke up late i quickly get ready and off to gym(: ^^
ohh today i am so productive. i follow mummy to somewhere which i never step in before. not gonna elaborate. and before i meet up with girlfriend i managed to do a resume for myself. hopefully i managed to get that job.
anyway, my class officially starts this wednesday. i am sexcited and nervous! i hoped everything gonna be fine. *cross finger and chattering*
my friends had been wondering, how i gonna concentrate with me working and at the same time studying as well. okay listen all my friends, i know studying and working at the same time isn't as easy as what we are thinking but i am doing this because i want to study and at the same time gain experience too. its not really about the salary that i gonna earn at the end of the months. really. money isn't the problem here because my parents had provide me with all of that. i received my expenses every week and i also received my allowance every months. but i ain't a spoil brats. i want to learn how to be independent.
i want to have that experience. some may not agree to my decision but heyy let me try for a few months okay. and i promised i will not neglect nor abandon u guys (:
anyway, justin have force me to make my own timetable so that i will not neglect my study. so with his help i have successfully managed to do my own timetable. and guess what, he have a copy of my timetable. BUMMER ! but anyway, thanks for forcing me(-.-) u are just awesome with cherry on top ! hahha! can u like sense my sarcasm?!
hmm, i am sick and tired of using mac book. i need a change. i want a new lappy can???? hahha. NO! i ain't a spoil brat.

anyway, happy 82th birthday granddaddy! okay i miss u already. i still remembered last year we all celebrate your birthday together. but i didn't know that last year was the last year we all can celebrate it. a few months after your birthday, u fall sick and u are admitted to the hospital and then u are gone. it was heart breaking for me and the rest. but we know u will rest in peace there(:
okay enough of blogging. i need to wash-up and i need to study at least 1 chapter today. yes, i only can study at night when i am at home. it is easier for me to concentrate though.
(:

at 12:46 AM

Saturday, February 20, 2010

hi humans,
just came back from meeting favourite girls. headed to sidah's house. and we were supposed to be studying but ended up we watched dvd. and since we changed the planned we called nabilla to come over. we had movie marathon instead of studying -.- but it was awesome. its been quite sometimes since we did that together. and the best part was sidah cooked for us for our late late lunch. and she scolded me for not knowing how to cook. BUMMER!
but anyway, aidah gonna teach me how to bake. right aidah??? so guys i will bake for u one fine day. hehh.
didn't jogged with daddy for 2 freaking days but instead i went to the gym(: and guess what i make friend with this guy in the gym. it was funny actually but hi new friend. and my bud is aching(Y) hahha.

okay enough of talking and wasting my time here. i have to study ! (:
and this week i don't have any english homework. hohoho. and i am in love with my english class.
all my friends find it weird but hey its not because of that caucasian teacher okay. beside he his not the only caucasian there. the teachers in my english school are all caucasians so there's no big deal. i just like it maybe because of their teaching techniques and the surrounding and the cool friends i had already made. MAYBE!
okay enough!

p/s: u just one pathetic boy. get that in ur head. and ohh please don't ever looked me up. just have fun with ur new girl friends.

(:
STUDY TIME!

at 9:14 PM

Thursday, February 18, 2010

hi humans,
i feel like updating. but i just don't know what to update. this few days have been alright.
catch valentine's day with girlfriend. we watched midnight show and thanks to her i went back at 2am. lols !
its been awhile since i watched movie. i kept thinking about u when i was in the theater. we used to watch movie every week back then but now we don't even contact each other. good things come and go. forget it and lets move on.
i went jogging 3 days straight with dad every morning. woke up as early as 9 am so that daddy won't leave me.. haha..
jogging with him was awesome and we end the jogging session by challenging who reached home first. damn lame but it was awesome fun(:
today was weird. went jogging with dad again. and after jogging i sat at the dinning table where we had our breakfast at. since i am not the kind that eat breakfast so i was staring at the food and trying to relax after jogging. then dad start a convo with me.
dad: tired??
me: what do u think?
dad: evil laugh* not going out today?
me: how to? u don't give me money? give a sad face*
dad: i give u malaysia money.
me: arr no thanks.
dad then grab his wallet and give me 50 bucks
me: OMG ! thanks. Mom i am going out today!
dad: u cannot asked me for money for one month.
me: WHAT???
dad: evil laugh*

haha! he so random.. i like(: i wished he is like this everyday which is super impossible.
but i was lucky enough that i got pocket money every week!
i am sooooo bored but i cannot sleep! GEEZ!

p/s i got ANG BAO! i like(: and i am in love with a book -.-

at 12:21 AM

Sunday, February 14, 2010

hi humans,
First thing first, Happy Lunar New Year to my chinese friends and Happy Valentine's Day to everybody who is celebrating it.
so today is just another random day for me. rotted at home like nobody business.
i seriously don't know what to blog but i do enjoyed myself yesterday with the mates.
i am lazy to elaborate. but i know i have so much fun because that the important thing.
everybody was kinda shocked to see me especially the girls.
they were a little upset i guess because i didn't tell them something that they should actually know.
i am sorry. really really sorry.
i know i should tell u guys earlier or when we called or text each other but i just don't want to make things complicated.
things are just to difficult. it is really difficult for me to voice it up to u all eventhough i know that after telling it all to u guys will make me feels better but something in me is stopping me to do that.
besides, i just don't want to make u guys worry looking at my sad condition. i just want to make everybody happy and thats the reason why i always wear a happy face. because i know even if inside of me is dying i know that i have made u all happy somehow. i am sorry.
and thats the reason why i have changed. but i am happy now somehow. the truth hurt but we have to move on.
thats what i am doing now. but i can't deny that i am blessed with good friends around me(:

this year valentine's day is nothing. i don't want to celebrate it either.
we have been through u left without giving me any certainty.
i wished u know how i feel but unfortunately u doesn't.
but i was shocked to receive ur phone calls.
but the feeling have faded.

at 6:34 PM

Friday, February 12, 2010

AWWW i missed reading love letters. but it remind me of my high school days.. the first love letter i used to get was in sec 1. it was hilarious back then. i was super scared like a major loser. HAHA! but till now i still keep all the love letters that i used to get in a box safely.. but i don't mind if my mom were to read it because she is not the narrow minded type who were nagged at me and stuff. we are opened to each other(:
and so i am kinda excited for tomorrow lunch date with the fellow mates !!! (:
okay then.

(:

at 10:56 PM

Thursday, February 11, 2010

hi humans,
i don't know how i should start of my entries but today was the day that i was being fooled by Mr. Troublesome. and i swear i look, sound like an idiot. and all thanks to him.. but at the end of it he really make my day. okay that was weird.
he lied to me. he make story, he told me some true story , he make a confession, he told me something stupid and he burst it out to me saying that it was all a jokes. what a drama-mama he is. but he make me laugh, he make me shocked, he make me angry, he make me smiling to my phone.
he was the awesome best best friends i have got. because he told me that he do that just to make me feel better after going through so so much things. AWW! i know right. what a awesome best best friends !!! (:
i appreciate it eventhough it make me feels like an idiots.

i can't sleep peacefully yesterday night and all thanks to u. and i don't think i need to mention name.
i just thought u were one of my favourite friends but i didn't know things turn out to be this way.
i know u want the best for me and thanks for all the advice but your words really pulled me down in someway or another.
nobody want their life to be screwed up. but things didn't always turn out the way u want it to be.
and that is what happening to me. and for every path that i decided to take now, i will really think through and then i will go for it because i have learn my lesson. but the way u say and the way u elaborate it making me look like a loser and i will not make it when i took this path.
and u even try to compare me with this girl that is way way different than me. i am not like her and i know i would not be like her. she's different and so do i. i got my own way of thinking. and i really hate it when people try to compare me with some other person. because i believed that everybody is different in their own way.
i know what i am doing. and i know i am taking such a long path to achieve my dreams but i think time is not the reason why i should not be able to achieve my goals. i will not let ur words pull me down no matter what happen.
because i got all the support that i need from my family and from my other friends . and that is all i need.
and for once stop forcing me to do something that i don't want to do.
i have my own choice and i have the right to decide... and stop threatening me with that phrase over and over again because i will not give a damn on it anymore..
sorry i just need to clear up things that i have bottled up.

(:

at 11:29 PM

Tuesday, February 09, 2010

hi humans,
i am bored and i am trying to kill time. i just finished doing my english homework which is due this coming thursday.
and i have to come online to do the work. so i take freaking 3 hours to complete it because i got distraction from using all the other sites and i was watching tv.. goshh that bad.
but i am done and i am satisfied. and lucky my mac book have thesaurus that somehow help me. hohoho.
chinese new year is around the corner so do valentine's day.
talking about valentine's day.. nahhh not interested because it is just another random day. -.-
beside its CNY so most probably most of the shop gonna be closed.. DANG!
but i am excited because i gonna have valentine lunch with mates this coming saturday. ^^
haven been meeting them for ages and for sure there is alot of things to catch up andand not forgetting the camwhore part.
i thought of making for them some cute stuff so that i can give them but i have got no idea what to make-.-
so i have make myself useful at home by helping mummy with the house chores(:
i don't like my hair. hair can u grow faster please please please with chocolate fudge on top(:
i want to watch movie can. somebody ask me out can. anyone??
and i wanna go swimming and gym...
i am dying..

ohh gosh i miss my laughing pills!
(:

at 11:38 PM

hi humans,
updateupdate.. wanna know my latest news?? i have finally resigned from my current job. so called me a jobless kids again?! i can't be bothered. send my resignation form last thursday and my last day of work was on saturday. 3 days notice like what they told me during the interview. i wanted to stay longer but i can't bring myself to it. ive been enduring for 1 month 1 week and thats it. NO MORE NO MORE! they asked me to stay and their reason for it was CNY coming and they don't have enough worker.
watever with them. i am happier now. i mean i got my life back i got my freedom back. no more waking up as early as 8 am rushed to work and reached home at 1015pm. NO MORE ! and the most weird thing was my friends were all excited when i told them i have quit. -.-! haha! i know rightttt.
sunday was awesome! had my morning jogged with daddy. its been ages mann. i feel so good after the run(: then later in the afternoon saloon-ing with mummy was awesome. and at night movie date with family(:
see i am enjoying my life without YOU ! who say i can't leave without YOU? its been so long since u last msg me and eventhough i can't deny that ive been missing u and missing all the outing that we usually does but i am not waiting for ur text nor ur phone call anymore. and i guess u are having fun right now. i know u too well, boy.

so what am i up to now?? arr i have no idea. maybe rotted at home??
and i am sure people have been wondering which school i will go to and stuff.. i am ready to blog it out.
O level result was out in early january and f**k i was damn disappointed with my result. it isn't what i expected it isn't what i want. most people think that my result isn't thats bad but to me it is the worst result ever.
they offer me poly courses and all but i just can't be bothered with that because from the result i know that i am not qualified for the course i want. the only thing i know is i went back at 830pm on that day wandering alone without anyone knowing.
and went i got back, eventhough my parents didn't say anything i was crying my lungs out. and the only thing i do is lock myself in my room and cry.. but i got the best parents ever. they didn't scold me but instead they give me the encouragement.
they were telling me how lucky am i to pass all my subject but the only thing is i can't qualified for that course that i really really want from the start.
at that point of time i seriously don't know what to do i am clueless i am at my wit end. i don't know if i should just go to poly with that i-am-so-not-interested course and drop out halfway or what.. the only thing i am thinking about was if i could turn the time back... but it is not possible.
so after a deep and throughly thoughts i decided to retake 1 of the subj which is english. but my parents wanted me to retake 1 or 2 other subject since i don't want to get myself into any poly courses and take it at the same time. so ive decided to take english and science. but they insist on me taking emaths since they know that i can score in that subject. they told me what if i can get better grades for maths and that will help me even more in lowering my points. so i agree and ya i am taking private.
it isn't easy when i choose to take up this way because looking at my other friends going one year ahead then me. but i was told by a friend who have been in my shoe a year ago," it doesn't matter how slow u go as long as u do not give up". that phrase really lift up my spirit and just move on. but this year i really need to work hard i wouldn't want to disappoint my parents seeing that they have willing to pay up thousands and thousands of dollar for the privates.
and i am blessed with sucha awesome friends whom always give me encouragement(: and seeing me going through the hard way, some of my friends who didn't do that well also have decided to retake instead of going to the course they don't want and all. thinking back i was damn coward to face the true when i just got back the result. -.-

ohh and i was on my way to meet a friend went i passed by starbucks coffee house and i saw a girl sitting down doing her amaths question. and she really remind me how tense will i get when i can't do that question that were given. i will start throwing the paper and tears almost drop. not forgetting that i used to get 5/50 for one of the class test.. hahha!
but thank god i passed during my O's(:
it is sucha long post...
and" kuku-ness" i am craving for that western food at ur school and fishNco -.- hinthint.

(:

at 12:11 AM

Friday, February 05, 2010

hi humans,
haven been blogging because firstly i've been busy working and i am running out of idea on what to blog.
life is getting better i guess. work make me sick because it is always the normal routine every now and then.
but i always keep myself updated with what my friends are up to. like duhh. we text everyday(:
just now work was quite okay. since it is friday it isn't that dry. and i am hoping the next two days gonna be just like just now.
because i need the time to passed faster when i am at work.
ohh let me share what happened just now at work.
there's 2 young lady entered the shop and told me that they are here to collect their clothes. and at the mean time they look around and they wanted to try this piece of shirt. so they asked me if i got bigger size because the lady who wanted to try it on is quite big. so i quickly find the stock and gave it to her. and guess what she keep asking me for more clothes. in total she try almost 8-9 pieces -.- and for god sake i have difficulty finding some of the stock because i need to dig it out from the shell.
and every piece she try she will keep complaining. -.- and ended up she just lump all the clothes at one side and went out.
and i was damn pissed at that point of time. because i need to fold and packed it all back. and folding clothes isn't easy as what u think it is especially when it come to BIG size clothes. then here come the best part.
aunty: they went off already without buying anything after trying all this?
me: yupp.. they just try, collect their clothes and buzz off after giving me this shit.
aunty: bloodyfool fucker!
i was shocked at that point of time and i started laughing. i mean she isnt that old but i didn't know that she is so vulgar.
and guess what the girl who work opposite my shop is no longer there -.-

ohh and i am quitting my job really soon. because i think i need to focus.
right, aidah?? okay random. most probably my last day of work will be this coming sunday. (: and no more eyecandy :(
EXCITED ! not EXCITED!
nothing much to say.
anw,
HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY FAIZ !
HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY SAHAIL ! (:
HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY JUE QI !
okay its belated belated belated. but no worry i have wished them thru sms.

i'm off!
p/s: how can i moved on when i still love u. -.-

at 11:46 PM